Pause,Notice,Choose.

 

Pause. Notice. Choose.

 

I remember feeling like a passenger on a runaway train, unable to control the thoughts racing through my mind or the emotions swirling in my chest. But I've learned that you don't need fancy tools or elaborate techniques to reclaim control over your thoughts, feelings, and choices. You just need clarity and the willingness to use it.

Let's start with your thoughts. When your mind starts racing or turns negative, step back and observe. Notice the thought, but don't fuse with it. Remind yourself, "This is just a thought. It's not who I am, and it's not a command." I used to get caught up in catastrophic thinking, convinced that every minor setback would lead to disaster. But when I started asking myself "Is this useful? Is this true?" I realized how often my thoughts were lying to me. When you notice thoughts spiraling, interrupt the pattern by asking these questions. If the answer is no, shift your attention to something around you, or say out loud what you see and hear. By naming things, you anchor your mind in the present.

Now, let's talk about emotions. Feelings will rise, sometimes strong, sometimes subtle. But feelings are signals, not orders. When one hits, name it. Say quietly, "I notice frustration." Or, "Here's some anxiety." Then take it one step further: ask, "What sensation is in my body right now?" A tight chest? Heat in your face? Knot in your stomach? By identifying your feeling and locating it physically, you separate it from your identity. I recall a particularly tough conversation with a friend where I felt a surge of anger. Instead of lashing out, I took a deep breath and acknowledged my emotion. "I'm feeling angry right now," I told myself. "It’s in my clenched jaw and racing heart. It's okay to feel this way." By accepting my emotion and grounding it in my body, I was able to respond more thoughtfully.
Breathe slow and deep – this signals your body that it's safe. Hold space for your feeling, but don't let it steer. Imagine it as a passing cloud. Remember, all emotions are temporary. When you allow them, they pass faster. When you fight them, they stick. So, practice acceptance, not suppression.

 

Finally, actions. The only thing you truly control is what you do next. When you've noticed your thoughts and felt your emotions, pause before you act. Ask yourself, "What choice aligns with my values right now?" For me, my values are kindness, curiosity, and resilience. Sometimes the right action is to speak; sometimes it's to be silent. Sometimes it's to move forward; sometimes it's to wait. Before acting, do a quick check: Will this action move me closer to the person I want to be? If not, I don't do it, at least not yet. Stand tall, breathe, and choose, even if it's just standing still for a moment.

With time, that pause will become your greatest power. So remember: notice your thoughts, accept your feelings (and where they live in your body), and choose your actions. Practice this, and you'll unlock a freedom most people never touch. I've seen it in my own life, and I'm confident you will too.